Cicadas in the wind——风中的秋蝉

风中的秋蝉

Cicadas in the wind

 

作者：雪漠  译者：沈佳月(苏州)

 

你来的时候正是金秋，

秋风摇动着心中的桂子，

那时的天空到处是彩光，

一若无边无际的希冀。

 

It was golden autumn when thou came,

Osmanthus flowers were swaying in the wind.

Multiple colors of the sunlight spread over the sky,

Like the vast and boundless hope in your mind.

 

你去的时候已到冬天，

北国早已是冰天雪地，

大地肥了你却瘦了，

很像那一片焦渴的土地。

 

It was freezing winter when thou went away,

The north was all covered with ice and snow.

You left the earth with fertility,

Yet you became a land without vitality.

 

我老是想到那年的秋月，

风中总有你的笑语。

你的笑声里其实有沉重，

沉重的还有命运的赌注。

 

The moon in that autumn always reoccurred to me,

As well as your laughter in the wind.

Your tone of voice revealed some sadness,

And deep concerns about your destiny.

 

命运真是个沉重的词，

沉重得像那千年的黄土。

你总想弹出你的曲子，

只是无论咋弹，

也弹不出轻盈的旋律。

 

The term Destiny weighs like a stone,

As much as the sand of the sea shore.

No matter how hard you have tried,

It never seems possible for you

To play a melody, feeling joyful.

 

你就被压在命运的尘土中，

像压在我书中的那只蝴蝶。

寒冷榨干了你的鲜美，

还有你那飞翔的轨迹，

还有空中散溢的花香，

还有一缕梦中的乡土。

 

The dust of fate covered you up,

Making you the butterfly in my book.

The coldness dried your freshness up,

Together with your flying track,

Not to mention the fragrance in the air,

As well as the blurring flashes of your homeland.

 

只是你走后的日子寂寥，

灰蒙的天空到处是雾霾。

触目可见的灰色里，

写满了那个叫虚无的词。

 

You left the world with loneliness,

And the sky was covered by haze.

Everything visible turned into gray,

Resembling a kingdom full of emptiness.

 

虚无的词里没有意义，

意义也埋入黄土深处，

萧瑟总是在命运中啸卷，

卷走了一如既往的诗意。

 

The word Emptiness carries no meanings,

As meaning has been buried into the ground.

Depression keeps washing your fate,

Rolling away the romance as always.

 

总想化为火中的蝴蝶，

总想在月光下吟诗，

总想吐出那一份疼痛，

总想看到那一抹新绿。

 

I always want to be a butterfly on fire,

Reading the poem under the moonlight.

I always want to run away from pain,

And watch the greenness in the spring.

 

总想把命运的车轮逆转，

总想春暖花开的时候再见到你。

总想在静的极致里发出哭声，

总想在无你的日子里有你。

 

I always want to reverse destiny wheel,

And see you again when flowers bloom.

I always want to cry in the silence,

Thinking of you and wishing you back.

 

总想看到诗意的晚霞，

总想在笑的间隙叹息。

总想放下那一堆词语，

总想揪断觉悟的珠子。

 

I always want to watch the poetic sunset,

As well as sigh in fits of laughter.

I always want to put away piles of words,

And pull apart the beads of enlightenment.

 

总想定格风中的清凉，

总想打破时光的规律。

总想捣碎生命的无常，

总想再有命运的相遇，

总想驱散轮回的阴霾，

总想看到新一轮旭日。

 

I always want to freeze the cool breeze,

Breaking the rules of time.

I always want to smash the impermanence of life,

Embracing another version of fate,

I always want to dispel the haze of reincarnation,

Watching a new round of sunrise.

 

总想在脊背上添一双眼睛，

总想多一种会心的含蓄，

总想在夜深人静的时候，

品味浪迹天涯的孤独。

 

I always want to install a pair of eyes on my back,

In order to have a knowing implicitness,

I always want to taste the adventurer’s loneliness,

In a deep, dark night.

 

总想在江湖飘零的秋风中，

感受那揪心的痛楚。

那个叫觉悟的词其实太累，

就像没有色彩的日子。

 

I always want to feel the breathtaking pain of the heart

When the autumn wind blows.

The word “Enlightenment” is too heavy to handle,

The same as the days without color.

 

一串串的宁静里，

一串串的快乐里，

却没有一串串的你。

 

In the string of serenity,

And the string of happiness,

You are the only missing one.

 

其实我也想当一个樵夫，

也想去深山里砍柴，

可以有狼，也可以有虎，

可以有风，也可以有雨，

可以有一切的厄运，

可以有一生的游离，

只要有你。

 

In fact, I also want to be a woodman.

Going up the mountains and cut some firewood.

There can be beasts like wolves or tigers.

The weather can be windy or rainy.

Even all the bad luck attacks me,

Or I have to disconnect with the world,

I will as long as you are with me.

 

我还想当一个飘零的侠客，

带着那柄生锈的铁剑，

还有破衣，

还有磨穿的鞋子，

还有难卜的命运，

还有那厮杀后的疼痛，

还有无边无际的孤独，

只要有你。

 

I also want to be a lonely knight,

With my rusty iron sword.

Though shabbily dressed,

Despite of an unpredictable fate,

As well as the fighting pain,

And the endless loneliness.

I will as long as you are with me.

 

我其实不想当啥佛陀，

那是别人安排的角色，

我喜欢人间的味道，

喜欢你的歌，

喜欢你的小情绪，

喜欢秋风中吹来的曲子，

喜欢你吹奏的点点滴滴。

 

I don't really want to be a Buddha,

That is a fixed role in the eyes of others.

I like the earthly smoke and fire,

I like your songs,

As well as your little emotions,

I like your melodiesblown from the autumn wind.

As well a sall bits of sounds you play.

 

倒是眼前的世界依然有你，

它总能牵来阵阵的暖意，

一丝丝微风，

一晕晕陶醉，

一点点的感动，

一抹抹的相契，

也有那一线浅浅的红云，

还有天边大雁的轨迹，

更有那一点醒目的春花，

和那朔风里回响的曲子。

 

But fortunately I still have you in this world,

Which always brings me warmth and energy,

Just like a light breeze,

It makes me slightly intoxicated;

It touches my heart and soul.

And sometimes I have you unite with me.

There is also floating pink clouds in the sky,

Along with a flying trace of those wild geese.

Not to mention thoses tunning spring flowers,

Along with the melody resonating in the wind.

 

我的诗总是没有结尾，

很像我的生命和觉悟，

也如我心中鲜活的你。

 

My poems never have an ending,

Just like my life and enlightenment,

The same as the“you” in my mind.

 

风中的蝉翼渐渐远了，

一如那亘古的叹息。

我总是在别人的病里，

疼痛我自己。

 

The wings of cicadas aregradually fading away,

Just like a long sigh from an old soul.

Indeed, I always feel the pain and sufferings,

In the illness of others.

 

我于是看到了一轮新月，

它正在冉冉升起，

涌动着大痛，

也涌动着大力，

我很想它是再生的你，

却不知是也不是……

 

Then I noticea new moon rising,

Surging with great pain,

But also with great power.

I really hope it is a brand-new “you”,

Yet, I am not sure...

 

 

——选自《拜月的狐儿——雪漠的情诗或道歌》

 

 

雪漠文化网，智慧更清凉！www.xuemo.cn