Detaching Yourself from the World, Finding the True Meaning of Life

Series One: Pack up for the Spiritual Journey

Detaching Yourself from the World, Finding the True Meaning of Life

 What is life for? What am I supposed to do in this life? What do I live for? Except for my children and grandchildren, who will remember me after death? What I have done in my life is worthy of being praised? Is there any difference between me and the mediocre people in the world? Why do I exist in this world?

The life of an individual person is like a feather. Blown by the wind of karma, it has nothing to depend on and doesn’t know where it is drifting. But young people always think that drifting isn’t something to be afraid of, that the meaning of life is too faraway and too vague to consider. What they fear is missing the chance of finding someone to love or failing to have an unforgettable love affair. They would say, what’s the point of life, even if it is unworldly, if you have never tasted love? Such a young person envies romantic couples rather than immortals, because, not having tasted the bitterness of life yet, he expects its sweetness only. He is immersed in the dreamlike expectation of love – he only wants to find the girl he truly loves.

After hard searching, that girl appears at last, whose smiling face is as pure and attractive as a lake in autumn. When the girl smiles to him, his heart is waving slightly as an autumn stream. With the sense of uncertain happiness and sadness gushing out from his heart, he says to himself: so, that must be love. His mind is fed by the sweetness of love. He’s not satisfied with this fleeting happiness any more. He yearns to marry her, to have their own children, to be together forever, like two cypress trees twining tightly. He no longer wants to be a drifting dandelion, because now he has got something that he does not want to lose, that is, love.

However, he doesn’t realize that love is also impermanent and that his obsession with love is one of the reasons for his being away from freedom. When he comes to see the impermanence of everything, he will understand that nothing can be retained by means of obsession, including love. When I was very young, I was aware of the impermanence of everything, the discovery of which has impacted on my whole life. I learned from it that what I should do in my lifetime is to write something beneficial to this world. My work can make people cooler, more sober, and happier. It’s better for them to read my work than not to, which is what I called “beneficial.” Some people become more negative and emptier, or gain nothing after reading one of the currently popular novels. If that is the case, they shouldn’t have spent their precious time on such books, which is “profitless,” in my opinion. As my work can bring some benefit to the world, it is what I call “relatively immortal stuff.” Building something relatively speaking, permanent in our impermanent world is what I said we should do.

In the article “On the Cultivation of a Writer’s Personality,” included in Wolf Disaster, I mentioned that my persistent inquiry in my childhood about the meaning of life entrapped me in a terrible sense of disillusionment. I found that the entire world was impermanent and that nothing could last forever. I did not know why I should live since I had to die after all. This sense of disillusionment changed after I met Buddhism. When I read about the Buddha sacrificing himself to save the tigers and cutting his flesh to feed the eagle, I suddenly found the meaning of life. The significance of human existence lies in the spirit. Though the tigers, the eagle and the Buddha’s body turned into dust a long time ago, the spirit carried by the stories has passed down to posterity. That spirit is able to illuminate people's minds so that they may escape from the misery and get real happiness. That is the meaning of life. But those who are enjoying the worldly pleasures won’t think about those questions. Only when life reveals its true colors will they begin to contemplate the meaning of life.

After all, whether youth or love, or beautiful things, they all change; none of them will stand still forever. So are human beings. We keep changing in the powerful current of time. When we are young, we have endless energy. Soon, white hairs appear on our heads and the smooth skin becomes wrinkled. People are getting older day by day. Love, too, becomes flat after its brief magnificence. They are no longer content with the flatness of life. They get married, have children, and live an ordinary life. Happiness, anger, grief and joy are caused merely by a house, one or two children, or several cars. Won’t life slip by unnoticed along this stagnant road? At this moment, wise men start to question the meaning of life.

What is life for? What am I supposed to do in this life? What do I live for? Except for my children and grandchildren, who will remember me after death? What I have done in my life is worthy of being praised? Is there any difference between me and the mediocre people in the world? Why do I exist in this world?

He will find that love is not everything. Besides love, he also wants to understand the true meaning of life and the value he has to the world, and to find his mission. Now, he realizes this query itself is more important than love. He also finds that both his work and his family have hardships. With prices going up steadily, the pace of earning money must be faster than that of the prices going up if he wants to have a better life. There are always some mean persons in his company, and sometimes it is inevitable that they benefit from his work while he gets nothing from it. He and his spouse, who have vowed to remain a devoted couple to the end of their lives, tend to quarrel, sometimes violently, with each other over trivial matters, especially after they have had a child. Other unpleasant things are coming up one after another. As the Buddha said, “All tainted phenomena are afflictions.”

The bitterness in life can’t be diluted by cigarettes or alcohol, or resolved by reveling all night, or concealed by a moment’s success, not even made up by the sweetness of love. Whether or not he gets what he desires, the afflictions of life are endless. Bitterness, indeed, is the essence of life. “How I want to free myself from the endless bitterness!” Once this thought comes up, it can be said that he now has a little bit of the supra-mundane mind and that he is beginning to find ways of liberation.

Why is life so bitter? It is because people’s desires are growing constantly. In our childhood, being happy was very easy. When we found that we could own more, we then desired more and wanted to live a better life. That is the moment when we fell into the traps. The so-called “traps” are craving, ill-will, ignorance, pride, and jealousy. They confuse us and keep us away from coolness and liberation. We feel we are not free but we don’t know what to do.

At this time, some of us will pray to buddhas and bodhisattvas for salvation, while others start to reflect on life and seek the meaning of life. The latter, especially when someone close to them dies, will suddenly notice something, and then they feel a sense of mission and start to search for a belief.

That is because they discover the impermanence of life when they find that a family member or a friend who was alive yesterday suddenly died today. Then, they will feel a sense of vicissitude and realize that death is not so far from them. Maybe they would think: what will happen to my mortgaged house, my wife and children, and my parents? Decades later, will someone still remember that I was such a good person? They will also realize that the lawn before their eyes used to be a battlefield on which armies had fought and blood had been shed. Today, however, it is a place of rustic charm, where people have a picnic. No trace of bloodshed is left. Facing the impermanence of life, wars and conflicts can only bring suffering. It was because he was greatly shocked by death that he had witnessed for several times that Sakyamuni Buddha made up his mind to renounce the throne and all other worldly things and start to search for the truth.

When you have understood all this, you will come to experience the bitterness of worldly life. Gradually, you will be able to see it through and thus have a strong “supra-mundane mind.” Some people will embark on Buddhist practice in order to achieve ultimate liberation.

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第一辑：为心灵之旅收拾行囊

出离红尘，追寻人生的意义

人生为了什么？我这辈子做什么来了？我活着是为了什么？我死后，除了我的子孙，还会有人记得我吗？我这辈子做过的事情，可值得为他人所称道吗？我与这世上庸庸碌碌的其他人，可有什么区别呢？为什么这世上会有我？……

人生在世，每个人都像羽毛一样，被业风吹来吹去，无着无落，没有任何依靠，也不知道自己将要飘向何处。但年轻人们总是认为，漂泊不可怕，人生的大意义也太遥远、太模糊，他只怕找不到他爱的人，只怕不能刻骨铭心地爱一场。如果没有爱过，就算过着神仙般的生活，又有什么意义呢？他只羡鸳鸯不羡仙。因为，他还没尝到红尘的苦，只期待红尘的甜。他正沉浸在对爱的美好期待当中，只想找到那个自己深爱的女孩。

在他的苦苦寻觅中，这个女孩终于出现了，她的笑容就像秋天的湖水一样，清澈动人。女孩盈盈而笑时，他的心湖也像秋水一样，起着微微的波澜。他的心里升起若即若离的喜悦与悲伤……那，就是爱情吧。爱情的美妙润泽着他的心灵，他不再满足于一种烟花般短暂的幸福，他想和女孩结为夫妇，生儿育女，化为交颈柏，一生一世，生生世世永不分离，他不想再做那漂泊的蒲公英，因为他有了不想失去的东西，这个东西就是爱情。

但是，他不知道，爱情也是无常的，对爱的执著，正是让他远离自由的原因之一。当他认知了世界那幻化无常的真相时，就会明白，一切都是执著不来的，包括爱情。很小的时候，我就发现了无常，这个发现影响了我的整个生命，它让我明白，我这辈子该做的东西，就是写点对这个世界有益的东西。我的文章能让人们变得更加清凉、清醒、快乐一些，人们读了我的文章，比没读要好，这就是我认为的“有益”。有的人看了一些时下流行的小说，变得更加消极，更加空虚，或者毫无收获，那么就不如不要花费宝贵的生命时间去读这本书，这就是我认为的“无益”。我的文章对世界的这种益处，正是我说的“相对永恒的东西”，在无常中建立一些相对永恒的东西，就是我说的那些该做的事。

我在《狼祸》“谈作家的人格修炼”一文中说过，少年时代对人生意义的追问，曾让我陷入一种可怕的幻灭感当中，因为我发现整个世界都是无常的，没有永恒，我不知道，既然终究都得死，这活着，究竟有啥意义。这种幻灭感的改变，是在我接触佛家之后。当我看到佛舍身饲虎和割肉喂鹰时，我忽然发现了意义。这意义，便是那精神。那虎鹰和身肉，均已化为灰尘，但那精神，却以故事为载体，传递给千年间活过的人。这精神会照亮心灵，许多人因此离苦得乐了。这，便是意义。但是享受着红尘的甜而乐不思蜀的人们，是不会去考虑这些问题的。只有在生活渐渐露出它的“真面目”时，他们才会开始思考人生。

毕竟，青春也罢，美好的事情也罢，爱情也罢，总会改变，它们都不可能永恒。人在时光的洪流中不断起着变化，年少时有着用不完的精力，但很快就长出了白发，平滑的皮肤也起了皱纹。人，一天天变老了，爱情也在绚烂之后渐渐归于平淡。人们不再满足于生活的平淡：结婚生子，过着平凡的日子，喜怒哀乐不过为了一套房子、一两个孩子，或者几部车子。人生是不是会沿着这死水般的轨迹，在不知不觉中消逝？一些有智慧的人们，这时就开始追问人生的意义——

人生为了什么？我这辈子做什么来了？我活着是为了什么？我死后，除了我的子孙，还会有人记得我吗？我这辈子做过的事情，可值得为他人所称道吗？我与这世上庸庸碌碌的其他人，可有什么区别呢？为什么这世上会有我？……

他还会发现，爱情不是生命的全部。即使有了爱情，他也想明白人生的大意义，明白自己对这个世界到底有什么价值，找到他的使命。这时他才发现，原来这追问比爱情更加重要。他还发现，无论工作还是家庭，都有着让人无可奈何的苦：物价不断上涨，想活得更好，收入就要比它冲得更快；公司里总有一些小人，有时还不免为小人做嫁衣；誓愿白头偕老的两人，结婚之后，尤其生子之后，总会因为小事而发生争执，甚至吵得不可开交……其他不愉快的事情，也随之不断发生着，这就是佛说的“有漏皆苦”。

香烟美酒无法稀释生活的苦，彻夜狂欢无法排解生活的苦，一时得意无法掩盖生活的苦，连爱的甜蜜都无法弥补生活的苦。无论能不能得到追求的东西，生活的苦都没完没了。苦，才是生活的本质。“多想从这无穷无尽的痛苦中解脱出来啊！”一旦产生这样的念头，他们也就有了一点出离心，开始寻求解脱。

为什么生活会这么苦呢？因为人们的欲望在不断膨胀着。当人们还是孩子时，快乐是一件非常简单的事情，但是当人们发现自己能拥有更多东西的时候，就总想拥有更多，总想过得更好。这就是我们堕入那“罗网”的开始。所谓的“罗网”，实际上就是诸多的贪婪、仇恨、愚痴、傲慢、嫉妒，它们让我们受到迷惑，得不到清凉，得不到解脱，心中不自由，却又不知所措。

这时候，有的人祈求诸佛菩萨的救赎，有的人却开始反思人生，追寻生命的真谛。尤其在身边的人忽然死去时，他们会猛然感觉到一些什么，然后就有了一种使命感，开始寻找一种信仰。

因为，当他们看见那些昨天还有说有笑的亲人、朋友，今天突然死去了，就会发现生命的无常，这时，他们的心里会生起一种沧桑感，发现死亡离自己并不遥远。他们也许会想：他按揭买下的房子怎么办，他的妻儿怎么办，他的父母怎么办？几十年后，还会有人记得他是一个多好的人吗……他们还会发现，眼前这片草坪，曾是群雄决战的沙场，弥漫战火硝烟，染满了淋漓鲜血，但今天，却变成游人野餐的地方，充满了宜人野趣。当年群雄争得头破血流，却留不下任何痕迹。在生命的无常面前，诸多的纷争、纠斗，只会给人们带来痛苦，此外又有什么意义呢？当年，释迦牟尼佛正是因为数次目睹死亡而受到震撼，才生起了出离心，放弃王位，开始追寻真理。

当你明白了这一切，就会品出红尘的苦，你慢慢品那无常的苦，就会看破红尘，生起一种强烈的出离心，有的人就会开始修道，寻求一种真正的解脱。

声明：本文系文化志愿者试译，非专业人才翻译，错误定然不少，如出现疏漏及错误，敬请读者见谅。如有任何翻译上的建议及修正意见，欢迎及时与我们取得联系，我们会加以校对、修改，并希望有专业才能的朋友也能加入我们志愿者群体中来。